Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Armageddon To Do List

If those crazy Mayans happen to be correct then the world is ending on
December 21, 2012. This worries me because I am not what you would
deem a 'well travelled' individual. Growing up my family made the 24
hour drive, the pilgrimage rather, from Detroit to Disney World
approximately 21 times. Once we tried to spice things up and went to
Plymouth Rock to learn about the pilgrims. It was scary and smelled
like pumpkins so the next year we went back to Disney World where it
smells like oranges and Mickey Mouse. I spent 22 glorious years
wrapped in Princess Jasmine's embrace but that means I have a little
under one year to experience close enough to EVERYTHING there is out
there in this big beautiful world. Don't get me wrong I have seen
some breath taking sights, experienced sunsets that would humble any
man and I've intentionally eaten a cockroach but it's not enough. I
present to you my Armageddon To Do List:

-Stomp grapes in a tiny vineyard in the north of Italy
-Spend one week free of all social networking sites
-Concisely explain to one person what I can do with a degree in Communications
-Master the cartwheel (I will settle for a forward roll)
-Successfully use the word 'outré' in a sentence
-Be Princess Belle in Disney's Main Street Electrical Parade
-Watch all 3 Godfather films
-Organize the world's largest pillow fight
-Get in the Guinness Book of World Records (hopefully for the world's
largest pillow fight...back up plan: grow the longest carrot)
-Read everything Shakespeare has ever massaged with a quill
-Get a haiku published
-Zip line through Laos with the Gibbons
-Study yoga in an ashram
-Actually finish a full game of Monopoly
-Own a futon
-Have someone introduce me as 'This is my writer friend Natt'
-Write a novel
-Get on TV and start picking my nose
-Go to Carnival in Brazil
-Create an art project that consists of gluing money to random streets
just so I can photograph people who try and pick it up
-Do a literary pub crawl in Edinburgh
-Participate in a model UN (I would prefer to be France but will
settle for Malta)
-Learn to golf with vigour
-Do a one-person flash mob and see if anyone notices

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