Monday, May 16, 2011

7 Questions That Haunt Me

1. How Do You Do What You Do To Get Things Done?

I suffer from Procrastination. It is so bad I should attend Procrastinators Anonymous except I would probably put off going till next week when I don't have to catch up on Dexter. Time is tickin away and I am constantly analyzing the amount of time I spend not being productive. Then again every lazy moment I spent lying in bed, watching dumb sitcoms, looking at flight prices to places I may never get to go, skyping with people I haven't spoken to in months, reading music blogs, listening to NPR podcasts, daydreaming, sipping on the 5th cup of coffee...I didn't regret one of them.

2. Will I Ever Identify a Place That Feels Like Home?

Home is where the heart is...right? Or is home what you make it? Or is it a person? Or is it a feeling? I don't know. I have felt an intense comfort with people I have met here, so much so that I am staying for a 3rd year but would I say Busan is my home? No. Would I say Detroit is my home? No. Is my family my home? No. If they were and I am not with them then I am homeless as I type. Is home a shelter? To an extent I am sure but that can't be everything. Maybe home is a soul mate, maybe not. Maybe they aren't real...and maybe they are. Maybe home is a state of mind you find when you are completely comfortable with who you are.

3. Does Anyone Still Believe in God?

I grew up surrounded by Christians in an environment where God was coming at me from all angles: pray for your food, volunteer, witness, pray, repent, don't be close friends with non-Christians, pray some more, feed others, come to choir practice, wear skirts and don't cut your hair, only listen to music that exalts the Lord, Eminem is the devil, don't lie, obey your parents and you will live a long life, we are living in the end times, Jesus is coming, homosexuals are going to hell, sex is bad until the marital bed and to an extent I believed it all...until I didn't. Some aspects of Christianity and the Bible I still very much respect and admire.

Matthew 25 shows what it means to be an empathetic human being:
34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world.
35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in,
36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’
37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink?
38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you?
39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’
40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’

Since I moved to Korea the amount of Christians I have met has decreased substantially. I chose to leave this bubble in which I grew up and meet the world head on without so much as a naive clue as to what I was getting myself into...and I couldn't be happier. With a small exception here most people I have met are either agnostics or atheists and now that I don the same label (although subscribing to any one label is limiting yourself) I often wonder is there anyone who still believes in God or a higher power? Is this really it? We are, we live, we die, we rot. It is haunting.

4. Will Facebook/Blogging/Social Networks Destroy Our Future Careers?

Most likely. I love this blog too much to stop. I hope this doesn't come around to bite me on the ass at a later date.

5. What Will I Look Like When I am Old?

I am going to cross my fingers and hope I got my mama's genes. She is 55 and looks 35 and is quite possibly one of the most stunning individuals on the face of planet earth...inside and out. The real reason I want to quit smoking is not because of a cancer that may never come (cause frankly I am 24 and mentally immortal) but it is the dumb wrinkles that come along with it. Yes, I am vain to a minor extent. I care what I look like. Sue me.

6. How Am I Going to Die?

I know it is silly to even ponder about this thought because it is inevitable. We are all in the fast track lane to check out of this planet so why bother worrying about it? Because I can't help it. In a perfect world I would hope I die in my sleep, holding hands with the people I love, old, wrinkled (not from smoking) with a huge plate of Greek food in front of me. If I do die by some strange accident or some careless mistake whoever finds my body please make it look like I was doing something cool or being heroic. Thanks.

7. Will I Ever Meet Someone Who Made Me Feel Like You Did?

No.




My Beautiful Mom, I Love You So Much.

1 comment:

  1. I got some:

    What the hell is going on?
    How far can this go?
    Is there any such thing as too much sex?
    What is the cure for restlessness?
    When is enough, enough?
    How do you know when you expect too much or too little?
    How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie rool pop? (actuall tried this, one time 183, another 171, and another 133)
    What if the moon really is made of cheese, but it is just some kind of really ancient cheese that we can no longer identify as cheese?

    :P BoTik

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